The Ideal Man

Hello Lovelies,

I just ate an entire bread dish of strawberries with sugar in under six minutes. Naturally, this got me thinking about my ideal boyfriend. Of course I know this man is a figment of my imagination, and I certainly won’t turn away a good guy if he happens not to align with my list, exhibit A. my own boyfriend currently.

So here it goes.

#1 Obviously, he needs to have a big appetite. This is most likely the thing I had in mind as I devoured 4 servings of sugar covered strawberries in record time. I have this odd habit of adjusting my eating habits to those around me. So if I’m out with a friend or new male prospect I tend to eat as long as they do. In general I have a huge appetite. The kind of appetite that allows me to finish off 4 Krispy Kreme doughnuts in five minutes and then have a hefty bowl of cereal fifteen minutes later. Save your lectures. I’m a pro. I know what I’m doing. Do not try at home.

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#2 Good Shoes. This is a signal that this male has matured. A guy with good taste in shoes is usually thoughtful, reasonably eloquent and hopefully has a good job to pay for said shoes. I don’t know why, but a man in a nice pair of oxfords, well built boots or specifically chosen, trendy sneakers is a big turn on. This person is also likely to be a good gift giver. Happy Birthday!

#3 A good sense of humor. I know, I know. This is unoriginal. Nearly everyone on the planet, minus perhaps the Evil Witch, has this on her list. However, it’s true. I don’t want someone I can’t laugh with. I need a guy that will laugh at corny Google-found jokes. I would like someone that appreciates Will Ferrell and Mindy Kaling with the same reckless fan-girl abandon as me… also, ideally someone who is ticklish.

#4 Loves to Learn. I know we all have our special qualities, and some people aren’t meant for school. These people also aren’t meant to be my boyfriend. Sure, of course we can be friends. Let’s barbeque together! Let’s go hang by the lake. Let’s not date. As one of those wildly ambitious young ladies that get nervous when I run out of things on my to-do list, I need someone equally involved in education. Who knows when I’ll be finished with my education? Will one doctorate degree be enough? I can’t be sure, and I need someone who will be okay, even be supportive of that.
scary movie#5 Not a Scaredy Cat. It’s not that all men must be fearless, emotionless James Bonds. However, I love scary movies. I believe in ghosts and aliens. I adore those silly haunted walk things you find in cities like Charleston, South Carolina and Richmond, Virginia. I want someone to enjoy all of that with me. By enjoy all of that with me, I mean that I want someone who after watching The Ring, will convince me not to throw away all of my Disney VHS’s  I love so much. I want someone just excited as me to see Paranormal Activity 14 and World War Z. If they can convince me that the creek is not a snake pit that will collectively swallow me whole if I swing in by classic rope swing, I will swoon.

#6 Gracious Tipper… There’s an old saying that we all marry out fathers (or perhaps mother’s in some of your cases, I suppose, but we’re talking about me right now and I’m heterosexual.) Growing up my Dad was known for being a gracious tipper. We could be scrapping the bottom of the barrel just to go out to a restaurant, but if it meant everyone orders water instead of tea or soda, our server was getting a good tip. One major turn off is lowballing an excellent waitress or waiter. Give them what they deserve; for God’s sake they’re making 3.12 an hour. If you’re treating me and I have to supplement your tip, don’t expect a second date, or second base.

#6 Speaking of my parents: respect them. Respect them, but honor me. If you have done so well as to have gotten the opportunity to meet my parents, treat them with the utmost respect and you will win us all over. My parents are awesome in-laws. My mom is hilarious and sweet, and my Dad is super smart and helpful. If you were to imagine your ideal in-laws right now, you’d be envisioning my parents.  The trick here is when I fight with my parents the ideal boyfriend will support me, without bashing my parents, especially since in an hour, I will have made up with them, and sometimes changed my mind all together.

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#7 Southern Exposure, the last thing I feel incredibly committed to (besides the obvious, is a nice person, has a good heart, isn’t disgusting or a racist misogynist) is that they must love and accept Southern culture. I don’t care where they’re from but they have to be open to Southern hospitality, grits and sweet tea. I have this freakish heightened since of patriotism to my state. I love North Carolina probably more than television and Ikea combined. t’s the variety state, sea, mountains and piedmont… city and country, the history is rich and the people are mostly lovely. We’re the creator of the Krispy Kreme doughnut, Pepsi, Cook Out and Bo jangles, Nicholas Sparks, and more. Not to mention first in flight, and home of the mysterious lost colony,Dirty Dancing, Ricky Bobby. Jesus, I love North Carolina. The point is, I cannot date someone who isn’t open to loving North Carolina at least half as much as I do. No jokes about marrying cousins or being toothless. In fact, that’s a good way to get a knee to the groin, just a warning.

Okay, a little longer than expected, which I guess dreams usually are more than we expect, aren’t they? What’s your ideal? Have fun with it, what qualities or quirks would your ideal boyfriend or girlfriend possess?

xoxo,
-E

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Mindy Kaling, Are You Hanging Out Without Me?

Hello Lovelies,

I’m going to be honest with you. Mindy Kaling is my spirit animal. Go ahead and breathe that in.

Yes. I mean that I think she’s bad ass in a way that makes me want to get organized, have a perfect manicure , drink an awesome caramel latte and proceed to conquer the world and beyond. Author, Comedian, Screen-Writer, Dartmouth Alumni, Blogger, Lover of Loving things: this woman is too good.

Mindy has a rare quality of confidence extending past beautiful dresses and professional styling. You can see her brain ticking. She’s powerful. Hey, I’m not trying to get sappy, but she’s the kind of woman I can imagine getting lunch with. Lunch. Not a run down of each calorie she ate the night before. (Hint: that’s boring irrelevant information. SNS.) On another note, I can also totally see Mindy giving a friend a good slap when they get ridiculous. That’s a scarcely needed event, but when necessity calls, what can you do?

Successful. Witty. Talented. Respected. Gorgeous. Human. Gives me hope that maybe…maybe we can have it all.

Ladies and gentlemen, I’m only suggesting that you should watch The Mindy Project, read her blog and book and respect her as an amazing human being. Prepare yourself for future President Kaling, or E, if I can channel her properly throughout my spring semester!

Read more here, because you should. 33 things you’ll learn about Mindy by hanging out with her.

xoxo,
-E

P.S. Mindy,
Lets be best friends.
k, thanks.

Packed In Some Family Time

Hello Folks,

This morning we decided to take a trip to Charlotte to visit with my sister and nephew. I may not get a lot of WP time, so here’s a video to enjoy in the mean time. Although it’s Jenna Marbles and not me, it was basically the same situation when I was packing.

Hope you enjoyed my dears.

xoxo,
-E

Midweek <3 Moodbooster

Hello Ladies and Gents,

They say you should never go to bed mad, I’ve never really agreed with this. Sometimes I think it’s the best time to go to bed. Often times I wake up in a better mood, refreshed, renewed, revitalized… other similar “r” words. However,  there are times… especially after you’ve moved back in with your mother for the summer post your first year at college… that going to bed mad really doesn’t help since when you wake up the problem will still be there.

Inspired by this girl’s late night moodiness, here a few of my favorite pieces from across the net which will hopefully leave me and you both in a better mood for bedtime.

How To Be the Guest that Gets Invited Back : This article is an easy to follow guide on how not to be the house guests the hosts are gphotogossiping about behind closed doors, or rolling their eyes at every time you turn your head.  From parties to pool days, weekend stayovers to casual visits, this list has you covered.

Smart, Pretty & Awkward : A tangible guide to being a better you. I always feel like I’m a couple to-do lists and pencil skirts away from the oval office when I browse this website.

Teen Takeover: Three NJ teens have created a petition to have the first female moderator at a presidential debate. Between these lovely ladies, the awesome young women behind the photo-shopping petitions, the feirce five and the other teen women taking gold at the olympics, teens are taking over. As I finish up the last 5 months of my teenhood, these young women are making me proud and hopeful for our future.

Adventures in Fratland : I’ve never left this tumblr without a smile. Nuff’ said.

So there you go. Just a few of my cyber-stops on my journey to nixing a bad mood.

Goodnight.

xoxo,
-E